My Sweet Angel

My Sweet Angel
Playing Peek-a-Boo

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Trying to fulfill College Comp. II requirements for this week...... writing style is, well, fairly stream of consciousness. Or, informal, as our text would say. I utilize this most certainly in this blog, especially as it is my first, and as it is a venue for me to have a voice in a world where such is otherwise denied me. However, even when I am writing informally, it is important to me to be accurate in spelling and punctuation, and fairly grammatically correct (unless I'm using 'lingo' that is intentionally incorrect).
I find I do enjoy writing more academically as well, though I hate the whole long process of it (well, actually, I hate facing the whole long process of it; but once I face the demon, it's really not so bad).
My process? Am I supposed to know that as some sort of organized system? If that is the case, then I fail that one. The best I can do is this: I'm passionate about a lot of things; usually things that are happening in life to myself, my animals, my neighborhood, my friends, my world, my cosmos. When I can't 'take' (or really, 'take in') anymore, I usually find a place to let it all out on paper. I don't mean to give the impression that I write effortlessly whenever something strikes me as needing to be addressed; there usually needs to be an outside impetus that calls forth my writing. E.g., an introduction to a book; a story for a creative writing class; an academic assignment; and so forth. From there, however, I really tend to be a 'first draft' writer. I have rarely edited my work, so I am an infant when it comes to the sorts of things we do at Kaplan. Poor Matthew (C.C.I Professor) had one heck of a time trying to get the concept of 'stripping down and simplifying' through to me. God Bless him; he really stuck it out. I don't mean to be stupid or stubborn, it's just that my brain doesn't work in neat little boxes.
See? Here's a great example right here. I snarled at this assignment all day, then figured I could write a couple of sentences. Yeah, right. As usual, I am writing a tome. So, I'll stop here on this part.
Okay, so am I really to wait for folks to comment here?

• If there was one thing about your academic challenges, what would it be?
Aside from really grasping the structured writing concepts (as mentioned above), I would say it is dealing with illness and exhaustion all the time. So, it's not the work; it's my health.

• How is school influencing your life at or up to this point?
School is a Godsend. It has been over two years since I've received any sort of acknowledgment for anything. What I have received has been endless put-downs. It's been extremely challenging to not only lack support, but to also have to find a way to trust myself when people around me are just wanting to 'take me down'. I know this is a test to strengthen me, as I've always been extremely sensitive (or 'hyper-vigilant' as they call it in the biz); to give me yet another chance to not take things personally (something that is very difficult for me) and to stand by my own principles and convictions. Anyways, I had forgotten how well I always did in school, and how good that made me feel about myself. It's pitting myself against myself, and not others, which works for me, as I am a non-confrontational person (were there too many commas in that sentence?) It gives me a neutral and fair place to strive for excellence, and grades then are the reward (or the devastation, depending on how I've done!) It is the best thing happening in my life; the thing (besides my own brand of faith) that is giving my life the most meaning. I am so very grateful to be here.

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